


I'm never doing it again

by ChileanRach



Category: Football RPF
Genre: Angst, Established Relationship, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-25
Updated: 2015-09-25
Packaged: 2018-04-23 09:46:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,772
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4872151
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChileanRach/pseuds/ChileanRach
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Benny does something extreme for Mats to realize what he's done.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I'm never doing it again

**Author's Note:**

  * For [orangina](https://archiveofourown.org/users/orangina/gifts).



> Alright. The thing is I have never been a writer. Actually I think I suck at writing. This is the fifth time I've written fiction but only one person has ever read them. Today I wrote this for a second beautiful friend of mine and she encouraged me to post it. I'm feeling incredibly ashamed and embarrassed but I'm gonna give it a try!! :D
> 
> Maybe no one will even see this thing but still. If you see it, please comment me on your feelings about it. I would appreciate it more than you know ^^
> 
> I can't believe I'm doing this D:

Benny couldn't help but being mad. He was so tired. He was really in love with Mats but he didn't stand him going out all weekends leaving him alone just to go get drunk. 

It was Tuesday and he was still mad at Mats for what he had done last Saturday. They had finally gone out together but after a while Mats didn't even remember he had brought him. He left and Mats never knew. And those fucking girls!! They were all over Mats all the time! He knew Mats wasn't into women but, still…

He had the next two days off from training so he decided that it was time for him to do something about this. And obviously his anger didn't really allow him to make the best decisions. And that's how he came to the conclusion that going out and get drunk himself was the best option. A really silly thing to do but, what a fuck! 

He didn't really care about changing his clothes or fixing his image too much, he was always gorgeous anyway (not that anybody noticed it, he thought. And he was wrong, by the way). Mats didn't arrive yet and Benny had no idea where the hell he was. But it didn't matter in that moment. He wanted Mats to worry about him for one single fucking time, so he went out in that very moment before his boyfriend could see him and ended up in a bar far from their home. He had this strange feeling of going as far as he could so Mats could not find him and yet he wished, deep inside, that Mats would see him and would feel bad for making him sad. That feeling made him even angrier and gosh… he needed to do this. 

He asked for the first two drinks and literally poured them down his throat as water. He asked for more. And more. And more. He took drink after drink and even when his mind had started to get blurry, he still couldn't delete from his eyes the image of Mats forgetting him, Mats laughing without him, Mats flirting… and with women!! Mats… Mats Mats Mats!!! Everything in his stupid dumb head was Mats!! 

He was at the edge of a nervous breakdown so he did some weird things he doesn't even remember and managed to leave the bar with three more bottles of whatever alcohol they had. He didn't even bother asking what it was. 

Clumsily, Benny walked. He didn't really know where was he going. He walked with one of the bottles in his hand and the two others in the backpack he had taken out from their home. He kept getting the alcohol inside his system and not even himself could explain how this was happening. He had a few beers from time to time but he wasn't really the drinking type of guy. 

When the first bottle was almost over he couldn't walk anymore. He sat down onto the grass of… wherever he was now. Did it matter? Of course not.

Inside his pocket, his phone had vibrated around 16 times. Benny had no idea that he had gotten what he wanted. Mats was at their home terrified because it was 1 am and there where no signals of Benedikt anywhere. But Benny didn't know that. In his head, all he could see was Mats without him. Mats not even noticing his absence. If his body wouldn't have been so numb, he might have even jumped in front of a speeding car or something! 

He got one of the two bottles he had left and started drinking again. He could tell that he had probably paid a fortune for some fucking cheap shitty alcohol when he felt how it burned his tongue and throat and esophagus and stomach, all at the same time. But he couldn't bring himself to care enough to stop. 

In the meantime, Mats was almost having a heart attack. It was 1:30 am already and Benny's phone didn't even ring anymore. He was about to call the police or an ambulance or a detective, even, when he got a call. It was Marco. 

\- "Hallo?" He said, sounding desperate. 

\- "Matsy! What's up? Did you lose something?" he heard Marco speaking in the other side of the line and he could almost hear the smirk in Marco's mouth. 

\- "Why? What the fuck!!" he snapped. He was frightened and this mother fucker called him to make fun of him…

\- "Wow! Matsy, chill!!" Marco continued and he did laugh a little this time. "I was going back home with my Mario… and we found something that belongs to you in the way…"

\- "Oh Gosh… Marco where is he!!! What happened to him!!" Mats was screaming by this time. 

Mario took the phone from Marco and started talking to Mats

\- "Hey buddy… he's fine. We are looking after him right now but you really must have screwed up this time. I had never seen Benny like this…" Mario sounded a little bit more worried than Marco. 

Mario finished giving Mats indications to get there and they waited for him looking at Benny from across the street. Marco had suggested to leave Benny alone until Mats got there and fixed the mess he had caused. They knew him. They knew Benny wouldn't do something like that if he didn't provoke him. And oh, Mats did thousands of stupid things all the time. 

Mats drove like a criminal and when he saw Mario and Marco he felt so relieved… Until he didn't see Benny with them. He pulled over and ran to them. 

\- "Where the hell is Benedikt!!!" he screamed. 

Mario just pointed out to the park across the street. That poor man was destroyed. The bottle still pouring alcohol down his throat. And that's when Mats knew that he really messed up this time. 

He said bye to Marco and Mario and they headed off while Mats hurriedly made his way to Benny. He saw two empty bottles in the floor and another one in his boyfriend's hand and… shit… how could he hurt Benny so much!!

\- "Benny… baby, what are you doing here". Mats' voice sounding broken.

\- "What are you doing here, Mats! Leave me alone…"

\- "Sweetie… baby, please. It's 2 am. Let's get you home"

\- "No, Mats. You go out with your women!! Why do you want me back if you will forget about me!!" Benny cried. He sobbed, actually. 

\- "Baby, no. Don't say that, please! I'm so sorry baby. I love you. You and only you"

\- "You are lying" Benny cried even louder. And suddenly he gagged. And oh crap… it started. No stomach in the world could take such amount of alcohol. It had to come out. Benny threw his brain up in the grass of the park. And Mats could only feel worse. It was all his fault. He rubbed Benny's back until he finished and then took him to the car to head home. He opened the window in the passenger side so a little bit of air might help Benny out of his clumsiness. 

As soon as they arrived and Mats got Benny into their bedroom, he made a run to the bathroom and threw up again. Holy crap… he had drank way too much!! There was so much liquid flowing out of him. 

By this moment, Mats was so scared he started crying. He had never seen his Benedikt like this and he felt like a monster. He kneeled down by Benny's side and again, rubbed his back while the blond man kept emptying the contents of his poor stomach. 

When it was finally over, Mats got him out of his clothes and wiped his mouth with a wet towel. Poor Benny was a real mess. Somehow, he managed to start speaking again…

\- "Thank you, Mats. I'm home now so you can… go back to party or… whatever you want" he said while getting himself into some clean clothes. 

Mats cried again. He took Benny in his arms and sobbed with his face buried in his neck. 

\- "Benny please forgive me. Please don't push me away. I need you!" He said in between sobs. 

\- "You don't need me, Mats. You wouldn't forget me if you would". 

Tears had started running down the blond's cheeks but his face looked angry and hurt. His expression never changing. 

\- "Benny listen to me. I acted stupid. I see it now!! But I'm so sorry baby. I promise, I swear to you over my own life that it will never happen again. You're the most precious thing that has happened to me. I can't lose you! I… I will die without you" Mats squeezed his eyes shut as more tears fell from his eyes. 

Benny was still angry, yes. But he could see the honesty in Mats' eyes and words. He decided this was the last chance he was gonna give him. 

\- "You haven't lost me, Mats" he started softly. "I'm in love with you. I just can't deal with this anymore. I can't see you like that again. Those women and their hands all over you. And… no. I just can't…" his own tears choking him and cutting him off. 

\- "I won't do that again. I swear. I won't lose you for some stupid party or some stupid girls. You're the only one for me Benny. You are my life"…

Benny got closer and wiped Mats' cheeks with his thumb. Mats was worth trying again. This… their love was worth being saved. As soon as Benny got his hands in the black haired man's face, he took him in his arms and placed him in the warmth of their huge bed. He placed the fluffy covers over both of their bodies and got himself on Benny's side. He took Benedikt by his shoulders and pulled him in into a hug. 

\- "I'm never letting go, baby" he said placing a kiss full of love over his forehead. 

\- "I love you, Matsy"

\- "I love you too, Benny. I'm always gonna be with you" 

And Benny fell asleep with a small sweet smile on his face. Most of his fears gone by now. Mats stayed awake for some more time, caressing Benny's back and his cheeks, running his fingers through his golden hair… 

Once he made sure Benny was safely asleep, he kissed his forehead again and snuggled even closer to him, if it was possible. 

\- "I'm always gonna love you, baby…" he said, and he could finally reach some peace as he went to dreamland with his man…


End file.
